The Fertility Carousel

Reaching for the brass ring on the fertility carousel (again!). (Because I already caught the brass ring on the infertility carousel and I want to get rid of it!) Two years of trying to conceive, but I finally got baby E. Now we begin going around and around again. Infertility sucks.

Monday, July 07, 2008

4th of July

Hope everyone had a happy 4th! Ours was pretty low-key, we had some friends over for hot dogs Friday afternoon, but that was about it. We made no attempt to watch fireworks because I wasn't willing to keep E up that late.

Thursday night I had a brainstorm... since it's a 3 day weekend, why not try to do some night weaning and/or get E to sleep in her crib more? Oy. R agreed to try. E woke up around midnight and I went to get her. The idea was to comfort her but not nurse her. She screamed and cried and then quieted down and I thought, hey this isn't so bad. Then she started screaming again. Repeat the cycle 3-4 times. At this point R took E, but as he's picking her up she's grabbing at me like she's drowning and I'm a liferaft. And then I started crying/sobbing/bawling.

I took her back and nursed her.

Total elapsed time: 15 minutes.

I don't think E or I am ready to wean. Or maybe night just isn't the place to start.

I did make a point of having R put E down as much as possible. That usually goes well. He thinks it doesn't go well a lot of the times, but he can usually get her down in a half hour which is good in my book. Especially since there's no screaming involved. Sometimes there's crying, but often it's just fussing or not wanting to sleep. He does a good job.

I think that it'll take a bit longer than "a month or so" to get back to the RE. Unless I plan on trying while nursing. And it may come to that, but not yet.

After Thursday night's fiasco, I'm ok with waiting even if it's another year. And maybe I'm ok with only having E. She'll never be an only, she does have A, her 13yo half-brother... but of course with an age-gap like that (and the fact that he doesn't live with us), she'll be an only in many ways. But maybe that's ok.

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